EntertainmentPodcast with Venom and Metallo
by batman100
Summary: Venom and Metallo turn the radio world upside down as they host their own podcast with their trademark bizarre viewing of pop culture and few tidbits of Venom's oversized ego. Special Marvel guest featured and a short speech ad by Thanos!


**EntertainmentPodcast with Venom and Metallo by Batman100**

**Author's Note: Thanks to JB Writer for giving me this inspiration. This is strictly AU with a dash of OOC. Also, I don't own DC Comics or Marvel.**

***AC/DC's Highway To Hell guitar riff***

_**I'm on the Highway to Hell**_

_**On the Highway to Hell**_

_**Highway to Hell**_

_**I'm on the Highway to Hell….**_

**Venom: **Good morning, fleshies of America! This is your favorite symbiote monster man Venom reporting to you live from New York Radio KZAK 1099

**Metallo: **Right back at ya, Venom, and this is Metallo, the hunk of mean lean machine, also reporting on this beautifully chilly Wednesday morning, brought to you by Lionsgate, and by the Hunger Games: Catching Fire opening THIS FRIDAY, BABY! **roars loudly** Our topic today is you guessed it: the Hunger Games movie!

**Venom: **Right you are John. You know, when we saw the first film, we had a large amount of horny energy with Katniss on the screen

**M: **Uh, Eddie, you **do know** it's a movie right? And even if she **did** see you, lets' just say the results would be… unpleasant

**Venom: **Whattaya mean man? We have always shared a crush for Jennifer Lawrence

**M: **Right, right. Which reminds me, in case you moviegoers want an update, catch her and Bradley Cooper, Christian Bale and Jeremy Renner in American Hustle, opens next month

**Venom: **We thought the original title was American (bleep)

**M: **Oh, I see what ya mean. And I'll tell you something else, we have a special guest in the studio this morning. You know him from the Avengers, and you've seen his arrows, so give us a large cheer for…

**Venom: KATNISS EVERDEEN?!**

**M: **Wrong, its HAWKEYE! **fanfare as Hawkeye enters set, sits on chair for interview**

**Venom: **Ah, phooey. Katniss is a far **greater** archer than Barton. She blasted a whole carton of explosives!

**Hawkeye: **Gee, what a coincidence: a crazy psychopath nutcase in some disgusting suit of oil is contrasting my bow and arrow counterpart to me

**M: **Venom, mind your manners. So Barton, how are things at SHIELD these days? Good to know you're back with Barbara

**Venom: **Hold the mayo! Mockingbird's ALIVE?! Why the hell didn't you tell **ME?!**

**Hawkeye: **First of all Eddie, it was a Skrull clone of Barbara, ok. Second, the **real one** was in Arizona and got in a scuffle with Carter Slade that ended rather messily. Third, we are now married, and no, you can **not** see her or text her on Facebook

**Venom: **Why?!

**Hawkeye: **well…. It was because of after that little 'Maximum Cloning' incident, that Barbara had to place a 9000 restraining order on you

**M: **Whoa… I take it Babs is still shaken after that Secret Invasion fiasco huh?

**Hawkeye: **Trust me Corbin, you don't even **want** to bring that up in front of her. She simply goes ape(bleep) all over the whole god(bleep) place when some dumb(bleep) references it

**Venom: **Well said, Clint. Uh… we have a lot more coming up right after this commercial break!

**MARVEL COMICS, IN FULL COOPERATION WITH THE FCC AND TELEVISION RIGHTS, FEATURE THIS 80-SECOND EDITORIAL**

**Greetings mortals, it is I, Thanos, the Destroyer of Worlds. Yes, you humans may think I seem like an uncaring, merciless, cruel, power-hungry and destructive god with no love for humanity. WRONG! I am most definitely NOT like that! If you really DO believe everything I did in that Annihilation storyline, your brains must have been turned to meat! And how in Jupiter's sake did I ever get involved with Galactus? That dimwitted, overgrown lummox is like a bull in a china shop! If I had my share, I'd have that giant peabrain shrunk to the size of a fruit fly and squash him like the insignificant nuisance that he is! But of course, all which has been said are only opinions, NOT FACTS. Allow me to repeat: Opinions Only, no Facts. In case you wish to comment, visit the Marvel Comics website for further details. Thank you for your attention and have a lovely Thanksgiving. And now, we return you to your scheduled fanfiction **

**Venom: **And we're back! We have a breaking update in the media news: a film version of yours truly is in the making! I mean, a film about us! Talk about major blockbusters!

**M: **Uh… Eddie, I think the film is on Flash Thompson… not you

**Venom: **WHAT?! **bulletin appears, censoring all offensive and insulting comments from Venom**

**M: **Well, I guess that's show business for us. Well that's all the time we have today! I'm Metallo, and this is Venom, and we hope you enjoyed our podcast! We have a full coverage of the Hunger Games Catching Fire premiere this Friday! See you then!


End file.
